A native English speaker wrote,
'I agree with the view that stars in the entertainment business are usually over paid. However, it is also true that it is only those who reach the very top of their profession who can get these huge salaries.'
My friend and I think that the second sentence can be improved. We suggested different changes:
a) However, it is also true that it is only those who reach the very top of their profession that can get these huge salaries.
b) However, it is also true that it is only those that reach the very top of their profession who can get these huge salaries.
c) However, it is also true that only those who reach the very top of their profession can get these huge salaries.
Is each of the above versions correct?
Which one do you prefer, and are any of them better than the original one?
The original sentence is fine as it is written. It is difficult to improve upon originality.
Keeping in mind that English is a very flexible language, all of the other sentenes would also be sufficient. However, the wording of the original would probably be what I would write to express the same idea. Any sentence and idea can have many variations. I will show some.
Variation #1 "However, it is also true that only those who excel in their profession
receive huge salaries."
Variation #2 "Remember, it is a fact that only those in the top ranks
of their profession obtain to the highest incomes."
Variation #3 "The brute fact of the issue is that it is only those in the upper echelons
of celebrity status who obtain to the highest incomes."
Variation #4 "Insofar as any discussion of high income pertaining to celebrities can be considered,
it should be realized that only those at the very pinnacle of their profession
get into the stellar income bracket."
Variation #5 "Not all celebrities acquire bucket loads of cash, because one must be in the
higher echelons of income to get that much money."
and on, and on, and on.
(But you cannot beat the original sentence.
It is a clear and straightforward communication of the idea.)
.
However, it is also true that only those who attain the very top of their profession can acquire these huge salaries.